Omat laulut

Tule tanssitaan-laulu syntyi aikana jolloin ystäväni sairastui vakavasti ja samaan aikaan lapseni olivat pieniä.

Hymyn takana on tallenne omien naamioidensa tunnistamisesta. Kuka olen naamion takana?

Teet sydämeni särkymään liittyy samaan avuttomuuden ajanjaksoon jossa ystäväni kärsivät.

Toinen muuttumiseen ja havahtumiseen pohjautuva laulu on Minä ymmärrän nyt.

Missä viivyt -laulu on jossain määrin toisinto virsiklassikosta Tule kanssani Herra Jeesus, sekä harmonian, melodian että teeman osalta. Tuo virsi on soinut monena väsyneenä aamuna mielessäni. Laulussa samastun myös muutamaan Jeesusta eri tavalla lähestyneeseen naiseen: Martan siskoon Mariaan, Magdalan Mariaan, kanaanilaiseen naiseen ja verenvuototaudista kärsineeseen naiseen.

Tule tanssitaan - Let's Dance

is a song about getting and letting go.

During that time my firend got sick and time was hard to her and to us.

On the same time I was living a lively life with my little children. That combination was hard to take. Then I made this song: Come, let's dance while it still some time left. The verse is more serious and sad and the chorus is inviting you to come and dance with me. Don't hesitate, don't think- just come with me. Let's enjoy once again! Carpe diem.

Hymyn takana - Behind the Smile

is a song about different masks what we are using. Sometimes they are needful like roles as a teacher or an artist, but sometimes they are damaging us more than protecting. What can I see behind my or your smile?

In the 3rd verse I say: Behind the face, there is another world: true human being, true God. And what I have learnt and heard, its is only Jesus where is the full humanity and full godhood on the same time. And he says that we can see him in every single people. So we can't treat any people on bad way or hurt him, becouse we are hurting also him, and also ourselves on the same time.

I am singing in the chorus: Oh, I am so waiting for - that smiling would end, I am waiting for the death of smile.

Teet sydämeni särkymään - You'll Break My Heart

is a song during the same time as Let's Dance.

In this song I think that God, or Life itself, put us to change, to grow, that we couldn't stuck in the lies like egoism. Sometimes our mind brokes also, not only our heart. It is painfull to take - I dont know which is more painful - to follow when somebody who you love is suffering, or if it is you who are suffering. In the song I pray: Your word guides me to believe still in the Love. Please help me to believe in Jesus.

Sometimes there is no sence in the suffering, it seems it doesn't lead anywhere and nothing good is going to happen. My song invites only to go on. You are not alone or the only one in the world. We are many here!

Minä ymmärrän nyt - Now I Understand

is a song about awakning, looking at the mirrow, blind eyes are opening and you are seeing some unpleasant there about yourself. It is not a nice moment. It hurts. The truth hurts so much, but that moment is not hopeless. There is somebody who says the word of mercy.

Missä viivyt - Where are you?

Where are you o Lord Jesus when the hateness hits?

I can't understand the hateness and its growing through these years.

In this hymn I also say: I can't bring anything richness to you my Lord, not gold, not honour, not power. I can just sit down in front of you and love you by my tears.

I wish I could "touch the tuft of your gown" to get healed, to shout mercy on us who are suffering.

And then, in the 3rd verse I say: Your way is my way, even I can't hardly see the road. Now it is hurting me, I feel the coldness, it is so dark. I am so scared of loosing you - but you will not loose me ever.